


Transitory

by yuletide_archivist



Category: Rurouni Kenshin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2003-12-19
Updated: 2003-12-19
Packaged: 2018-01-25 01:58:06
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1625516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yuletide_archivist/pseuds/yuletide_archivist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Written for Jen</p>
    </blockquote>





	Transitory

**Author's Note:**

> Written for Jen

 

 

"Hold the knife like this," she says, and she places her small hand atop his and nudges his fingers until they are in the correct position. He looks at her, his eyes cold behind those glasses of his, and she quakes inside. This is a dangerous game. She can't even imagine what Kenshin would think of her if he found out she was doing this; she can't even believe she's talking to this mad man. 

She knows what he's doing to Kenshin. She knows she should hate him. But it's difficult; he gets a look in his eyes sometimes that's so empty she can't ignore it; she knows what that look feels like. And it's easier to pretend things are normal. So she's teaching him how to cook. That's normal, certainly. 

She takes an onion in hand and peels off the tough outer layer of skin. Kaoru hates peeling onions. She always manages to touch her face while she's doing it and then her eyes water terribly. She doesn't really like cooking that much, actually, that's why it's always such a blessing when Kenshin's willing to do her. Her cooking never really comes out right anyway. 

She begins to dice the second onion, working as methodically as she can. Nikujaga is easy to make, thankfully. She's made it dozens of times before, mostly because it's something that even she can't mess up. She glances over at Enishi. He's making a mess of peeling the potatoes, hacking away at them with a surprising lack of grace. She doesn't think it would be appropriate to say anything; he still makes her blood run cold. 

"Are you done with those?" she asks more brazenly than she feels. The best way is to pretend she's not afraid; it sets him off guard and it makes her a little less scared. 

"Yes," he says, and nothing more. She's surprised at how quiet he has been; he talked to Kenshin while they fought, said such horrible things. She'd thought he'd be more like that, more loud and arrogant and vulgar. He's the quietest person she's ever met. 

She takes the bowl of peeled potatoes; he hasn't chopped them up yet, but she doesn't want to ask him to do it. Perhaps his arm still hurts him. It was injured more seriously then he let on. A pot is warming over the fire. She pours a bit of oil into the bottom and adds beef to saut. The ingredients Enishi provided are very high quality. He didn't lie about his wealth, but it makes Kaoru uneasy to think of all the horrible things he must have done to get the money that is paying for this food. 

He's looking at her strangely, and Kaoru realizes she's been daydreaming. Her first instinct is to hit him or yell like she might have done with Kenshin, but she holds her hand because this is not Kenshin and she cannot take such a risk with a madman. She blushes, and frowns at him. "Stir the food," she commands. "It shouldn't burn." 

Surprisingly, perhaps, he does as she tells him to. She shies away from him as he walks past her; his touch should be repugnant. She begins to cut up the potatoes he peeled, and even though she is not facing him she can feel him watching her. She's felt him watching her for days. It made her nervous at first, but she's not sure it does any longer, and that worries her. 

When she woke up in his bed that first day, dressed in a strange robe and her head fuzzy, she was afraid he had violated her. She was afraid because she couldn't remember, and because it seemed like something that such an evil man would do at the time. Men like Enishi held women in no regard. There was no reason that he would be an exception to that rule. 

But she's realized that he didn't touch her. He hardly touches her now, not even accidentally. There are times when she thinks he must hate her; that's how uncomfortable he is when she's around. 

She's done cutting up the potatoes. She brings them over to the fireplace and stands next to him to add them to the pot. The stew smells good, familiar. The odor makes her think of home, and winter. It doesn't make her think of Kenshin, but she wishes it did. His hands brushes hers as he goes to stir the pot, and she glances up, and for an instant, they look at one another and cannot look away. 

Kaoru is ashamed to say that she thinks Enishi is attractive; villains aren't supposed to be, and he is, if anything, a villain. It would be so much easier if he were old, or grotesque, if his outside reflected the evil she knew was inside. Sometimes, when she's watching him and he doesn't realize it, she sees something quite different in his sad blue eyes and it makes her feel ashamed. 

It's time to add the sake and the soy sauce. Enishi has little glass bottles full of each: expensive sake and tasty soy sauce, much better than what Kaoru can afford at home. She adds a dash or two of each to the pot as Enishi stirs, not too much. His stirring is methodical. He might have been standing in the same spot stirring for hours and not have moved a muscle. His gaze rests somewhere deep in the fire, but he's not really watching it. Kaoru wonders what he's thinking about. 

"It's almost done," she tells him, although it's not quite done; it's got to simmer yet. "You can stop stirring." 

He puts the spoon down on the counter and takes a step away from the fire. He appears not to know what to do with his hands now that he has nothing to occupy them with. His uneasiness sets Kaoru at ease. He's shy. It's cute. 

Kaoru hears the men at the docks begin to shout; they do so every time a ship comes. Her heart leaps. Is it Kenshin this time? Has he finally come to rescue her? She knows he will come; it's inevitable. Kenshin will save her from Enishi; good will triumph over evil. But when she realizes the ship that's just come to port is nothing out of the ordinary, just a delivery of supplies or something, she's not entirely disappointed. After all, the stew is not done yet, and she knows Enishi would never finish it properly. 

They stand in silence for fifteen minutes while the beef and onions and potatoes simmer, smelling all the while better and better. Kaoru is hungry. When her stomach growls she blushes, ashamed. Finally, she takes the pot from the fire and Enishi gets two bowls from the cupboard, surprising her, and she ladles out the savory stew for them to eat. 

They sit on the balcony that overlooks the sea. The wind is not very strong, but it makes Kaoru a little chill, which in turn makes the stew taste all the better. She eats with relish, but Enishi doesn't touch his. This is no surprise. She hasn't seen him eat three times since she came here. She's told him he's silly. He's never going to get better if he doesn't eat well. 

When she's finished her stew she watches him, watches him look at the ocean. She's never seen him look as sad as he looks today, but she doesn't know why. His eyes are red, but she doesn't think a man like Enishi can cry. She stands, and reaches to take his bowl away, but he's not expecting her. He doesn't even see her. When her hand brushes his, he looks up, shocked. 

He stands up, and it seems for a moment like he's going to say something to her, but he doesn't. He takes her bowl from her, and again their skin touches and Kaoru imagines she can feel something more than what she should in this brief touch. 

She follows him into the kitchen. 

When he sets the bowls down to wash them, she takes his hand and he tenses up, and she then knows she's done the wrong thing. But he doesn't do anything painful to her; he freezes. And she can tell, this close to him, that he has been crying, but she can't imagine why. She's never acted this rashly before, but she's never been so separate from all things as she is on this island. 

And Kenshin's not here yet. 

She closes her eyes, but then opens them because this is something she knows she must see, and she kisses him. His breath is sweet. He doesn't move at first, and she wonders how many other girls he's kissed and if he's ever burned for any of them like she wishes he would for her. She steps backwards, and his eyes look so deep she knows she could stare into them for hours and not grow tired of the view. And when he begins to leave she takes him by the hand and holds on, and kisses him again until he's returning the action, his hands on her neck and in her hair. 

It makes her ill to say so, but Kaoru never felt like this for Kenshin. She never saw such thanks and need in his eyes as she sees now in Enishi's, and his grasp was never as tender and desperate. 

Far away, down on the beach, a cry goes up. The Battousai's ship has been spotted. The Battousai is here. Enishi's eyes light up suddenly, but he doesn't leave her. Kaoru has tears running down her face but she clings to Enishi like she can't let go. But it can't last much longer now; the spell is broken. She lets go of his hand and drops to the floor. There is no destiny that could justify such a kiss as the one they just shared. 

Enishi leaves. She sits alone, cold on the floor, and cries, sobs harder than she ever has before, and for once she isn't threatened by this weakness of hers. She realizes she's got to go; she can hear yelling and Kenshin's voice. She is Kenshin's and she must go to him. But as she runs out of the house and down the rocky path to the beach, she is not looking forward, but back, and she can still feel Enishi's lips on her own, and she wonders if she'll ever be able to forget that feeling. 

 


End file.
